I'm Back!!!

Have you ever had a dry spell? I mean when your thoughts were just blank. I have been in a fog for a few days now, actually since my daughter created this enourmous task for me. Now don't get me wrong, I thank God for this and any opportunity to talk about the Goodness, Grace and Mercy of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I especially am grateful for the great testimonies he has given me. I also thank God for Hillari. She is my biggest inspiration. I love to write, meditate on the Word and create new ways to encourage people, believers and non-believers.

Everyday when I wake up, (well, when God wakes me up) exactly at 3:00am. It's our personal time together, each morning. We talk, laugh, sometimes I cry, I get comforted and revelation even more than the day before. It's like I have a personal date with Jesus, every morning. I know God has a since of humor because he gives me extra time (to brush my teeth and you know, get fresh) for our time together. I have timed it, time and time again. No matter when I get up or when I finish getting ready physically and mentally, by the time I sit down to start our time together, I look at the clock and it is always, exactly 3:00am. Thank you, Lord!

I am telling you this because it has what has changed my life. I mean from the inside out! You see, I used to "frost the cake" before it was done. See the "frosting" was me putting on the weaves, make-up, wigs, etc. to cover up what I know now as hurt, shame or guilt. "The cake" is me. I was a wreck, emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually. I thought if I looked good on the outside, it would make feel good. It did, I must say for a while. But eventually, it stop working.

I starting a new thing before I could even look in the mirror, again. I would open up my bible and read whatever the date was, I would read the same Psalm and Proverb. I also, have been keeping a journey for the last 20 years. Eventually, I needed more and more and now, even more. I know read devotional books (at least one per week) I am now reading Boundaries, by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. I read, study and meditate. So by the time I finish, it is time for my children to get up. That's normally about 6:00a.m. On a great day, it's 7:00a.m.

Every since, if I don't start my day with Jesus, Satan, is waiting for me before my feet hit the floor with his lies. It's what I must do in order to function from day to day. But as with life, people, things, and minds change every minute of everyday. I didn't wake up one day last week at my usual time, because I was up late watching t.v. (something not productive) and got caught up in a silly reality show and was exhausted and fell asleep on the couch. Well, I was too tired to get at 3:00am when God gave me the grace to do so. I went back to sleep. Wrong Answer... Every timeI do that, I loose a little fire, a little peep in my step, and I become lazy and it takes me a while to get back on track.

But the good news is that God is always there waiting, whenever I return. Well for now, I will end. If you hang in there and stay tuned, I promise, God will give me a word of encouragement for your circumstances. I pray that He give you enough Grace, Mercy, Peace, and Serenity until we meet again.

In Jesus Love,


KelliByGrace